What You Need for Your Chinese Wedding Tea Ceremony

Planning a Chinese tea ceremony is one of the most meaningful ways to honor your family's traditions on your wedding day. For many Chinese-American couples, however, it can also feel a little overwhelming, especially if you've never attended one before or your parents expect you to simply "know" what to do.

The good news? A tea ceremony doesn't have to be complicated. Whether you're hosting your tea ceremony at home, at your wedding venue, or in a hotel suite before the ceremony, having the right items prepared ahead of time will help everything run smoothly and allow you to focus on what matters most.

Here's everything you'll want to have ready.

1. A Traditional Chinese Tea Set

The tea set is the centerpiece of the ceremony.

A traditional Chinese tea set usually includes:

• A teapot

• Small teacups (to distribute to family)

• A serving tray 

  
  

Many couples choose a red tea set decorated with the Double Happiness (囍) symbol, dragons and phoenixes, or other traditional Chinese motifs. Others opt for a more modern design that matches their wedding aesthetic while still honoring the tradition.

2. Tea Leaves

The tea itself is symbolic of respect, gratitude, and the joining of two families.

Popular choices include:

• Jasmine Tea

• Oolong Tea

• Green Tea

• Pu-erh Tea

• 
  

Some families have their own traditions or favorite teas, so it's always worth asking your parents or grandparents if they have a preference.

You'll also want to have:

• Hot water

• A kettle or hot water dispenser

• Someone assigned to refill the teapot throughout the ceremony

Optional: During a traditional Chinese wedding tea ceremony, dry red dates and lotus seeds are included to sweeten the tea. These ingredients serve as strong symbols of good fortune, a harmonious and sweet marriage, and blessings for a prosperous family with many children.

3. Cushions for Kneeling

In many traditional tea ceremonies, the couple kneels while presenting tea to their parents and elders as a sign of respect.

Comfortable kneeling cushions can make the experience much easier, especially if several relatives are participating.

Not every family kneels, however. Many modern Chinese-American weddings simply have the couple stand or sit while serving tea.

4. Chairs for Parents, Grandparents & Honored Family Members

The honored family members should have comfortable seating while receiving tea.

Typically this includes:

• Parents

• Grandparents

• Sometimes aunts, uncles, godparents, or older relatives depending on family tradition

If your tea ceremony includes many relatives, consider arranging the chairs in the order they'll receive tea to keep the ceremony flowing smoothly.

5. A Small Side Table

A nearby table is surprisingly important.

It provides a convenient place to keep:

• Extra teacups

• Tea leaves

• A kettle

• Towels

• Gift envelopes or jewelry received during the ceremony

• Additional ceremony items

  
  

Having everything within reach helps prevent interruptions once the ceremony begins.

6. Traditional Attire (Optional but Common)

Many couples choose to change into traditional attire specifically for their tea ceremony.

Popular choices include:

For Brides

• Qun Kwa (裙褂)

• Qipao (Cheongsam)

For Grooms

• Changshan

• Tang Jacket

• Coordinating traditional attire

Of course, every couple is different. Some wear traditional clothing for the tea ceremony before changing into their wedding attire, while others remain in their wedding dress and suit throughout the day.

There is no "right" or “wrong” choice, only what feels meaningful to you and your family.

7. Red Envelopes & Jewelry

One of the highlights of the tea ceremony is receiving blessings from your elders.

Parents and relatives often present the couple with:

• Red envelopes (Hong Bao / Lai See)

• Gold jewelry

• Jade jewelry

• Family heirlooms

You'll want a designated place to safely collect these gifts during the ceremony.

Many couples assign a trusted family member or coordinator to keep everything organized.

8. A Tea Ceremony Guest Order List

One of the biggest causes of confusion during a tea ceremony isn't forgetting an item—it's forgetting the order of relatives.

Before your wedding day, create a written list that includes:

• Who receives tea

• The order they'll be seated

• Their preferred titles (Mom, Dad, Grandma, Uncle, etc.)

This simple checklist keeps everyone on the same page and helps your coordinator guide the ceremony smoothly.

9. A Bilingual Tea Ceremony Coordinator

While often overlooked, having a coordinator is one of the best investments you can make for your tea ceremony. If your families speak different languages, having someone bilingual guide the ceremony can make a huge difference.

They can help:

• Announce whose turn is next

• Explain what's happening to guests unfamiliar with the tradition

• Keep the ceremony moving at a comfortable pace

• Help avoid awkward pauses or confusion

• Set up the ceremony space

• Organize seating

• Coordinate family members

• Keep gifts safe

• Manage timing

• Cue the photographer and videographer

• Ensure everything runs smoothly while you stay present with your family

Instead of worrying about logistics, you'll be free to enjoy one of the most meaningful moments of your wedding day. Learn more about our coordination services HERE. 

Bonus: Items You May Want to Have Nearby

Depending on your venue and family traditions, you may also want:

• Tissues

• Bottled water

• Hand towels

• Extra tea cups

• A garment steamer

• Comfortable slippers for changing shoes

• A Photographer and videographer to capture it all

• Hair and makeup artist

• A small trash bag for wrappers or used tea packets

These aren't required, but they can make the experience much more comfortable.

Final Tea Ceremony Checklist

Before your wedding day, make sure you have:

✔ Chinese tea set

✔ Tea leaves

✔ Hot water or kettle

✔ Kneeling cushions (if applicable)

✔ Chairs for parents and relatives

✔ Small side table

✔ Traditional attire (optional)

✔ Red envelopes and jewelry collection plan

✔ Tea ceremony order list

✔ Photographer and videographer

✔ Tea Ceremony coordinator

Every family celebrates a little differently. Whether you choose to keep your tea ceremony deeply traditional or incorporate modern touches that reflect your own story, thoughtful preparation allows you to be fully present for one of the most meaningful moments of your wedding day.

If you're unsure where to begin, working with an experienced wedding planner or coordinator who understands Chinese-American weddings can make the entire process feel less overwhelming, so you can focus less on logistics and more on creating memories with the people you love.

If you need expert guidance to bring your vision to life, our wedding planning team is here to help. We specialize in Chinese-American & Destination Weddings! We will help you from choosing the perfect venue to coordinating every detail, we make the process seamless so you can enjoy the journey. Reach out to us to start planning your dream wedding today! 💍✨

Contact Us

For more personalized information, book a consultation

Instagram

For Inspiration and advice follow us on Instagram